JASON: They Called Me the Anti-Christ (Part 2)
I sat there that night knuckles white, choking back the tears, holding back the anger. I was at church. A place I loved. In a meeting. With people I loved. And a group of them had just called me the Anti-Christ. Truthfully, on the way out that night, I loved the church and the people there a little less.
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The people. They had called themselves my friends. They had called themselves my team. They had called themselves my pastors. And they were all there. And they all heard it. ”Jason has the Spirit of the Anti-Christ.” (I kind of just laughed typing that last quote. Sorry, I’m trying to be serious here.)
Have you ever been in one of those awkward moments of silence where somebody tells a joke that they just think is hilarious … but it’s not. Yeah, the room got that quiet. It got that uncomfortable. The pause was so pregnant that it needed a lamaze coach. It was truly one of the most surreal moments of my life - like when your first kid is born, except with more screaming.
I sat there that night and, for the first time ever, I got a very small taste of what Jesus must have experienced as his own friends scattered. Hurt (at the betrayal). Disappointment (at the lack of vision). Introspection (at the things I could have and should have done differently).
Finally, the pause gave birth. Friends, team members, and pastors were fighting. The people were at each other’s throats. Some of them wanted to put the cork on the bottle, rewind, start over, maybe say a longer pre-meeting prayer and read some of 1 Corinthians 13 first. But it was too late. A witch hunt was in progress, and I was what’s for dinner.
I sat there that night, saying little, thinking lots, but mostly watching. I remember thinking that people sure can screw a good thing up. Just ask Adam and Eve. Just ask Judas. Just ask … me. I remember thinking that this is going to pretty much ruin my week. I’ve found though that the hardest lessons are the most important ones. Yes, it was hard hearing the people say stupid things about me. Yes, it was hard dealing with that hurt. But it was important for me to understand (no, it was important for me to FEEL) just how broken we all, the people, are …
